The Racehorse Sanctuary
Home, alone totally....
Canon 750d 50MM Fixed Canon lens
For myself i dont have the opportunity to capture amazing shots like other photographers as previously explained i have fibromyalgia psoriatic arthritis and ankylosing spondylitis, so therefore i cant take my camera to amazing places, i can only take my mind to those places and i had that many ideas at one point it almost drove me insane it does to this day, the passion is alive in me, i am the only one who's willing to stand in front of the camera for so long....the days i spent alone on my own with ideas endlessly pouring out so i did it...i stood in front of the camera myself, i had done some self-portraits but only outside and i got this idea accidently when i noticed some paint glowed so artistically on my hand under a blue light, that was it, i bought a black light and experimented and experimented until i got the confidence to paint my face as i wanted, as i saw in my mind, i even dreamt some my ideas and they came to life....i shot the portrait but after many attempts of neon photography i wanted more....more context, so the mirror was my addition to this, and it truly made for a unique shot i dont really forget because it took so long like all my self portraits are created, hours of my own makeup i apply, it takes around 2 hours almost to apply the makeup in total one set of self portraits usually takes around three hours, as i control the light, set it up, direct it, control camera settings from my mobile handset too(i didn't have much choice!), with the canon Wi-Fi and NFC connectivity it allows me to apply the accuracy i need, such as focus around the eyes noise control, ISO, DOF, and shutter speeds i shoot full on manual i love the struggle sometimes it helps me push my cameras to their limit i like to know my tools in depth and how the light will spill on my face, constantly still adjusting lighting height of the camera and finally my own positions to bounce the light in the directions needed as its low light photography i find it some of the hardest for portraits,(the low light series) for obvious reasons, and that's why i thought id enter something a little different for my self portraits or at least i can explain that this was one of my longest images in time terms and creations.... Its me the creator in the image, i dont see myself as such though its more of a subject i paint a blank canvas for those viewwers to interprate how they like, with florestry as the theme and another image of myself through the mirror i must say it was hard with the lighting! not to bounce any light even onto the mirror, i like the imperfections they show my struggle to perfection, its a description of a fight i do daily and sometimes i get to show off the beauty of my mind and how creative it actually is, the days i cant get out, i do things alike this, others i enjoy outside with my rescue dog and a camera im present, but yet it feels like a gift of so many experiences through a lens i would of never had if i hadnt of picked up the camera thanks to my rescue dog....i started with my mobile and had no idea about DSLRS i thought i had made the wrong choice of money spent because i had no idea how to use it! no ideas of ISO or DOF and shutter speeds and how they effected each other, i looked online and you tube over time i got to this stage through being alone....and in allot of pain daily, yet these photos induce a flair up the next day and sometimes on the day depending on "workload" i put on myself, its worth every bit of pain and inspiration it then may become....
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